"Life in the Pause" Breaking Down Barriers of the Past to Shine Light on Menopause for Women Over 50
Did you know that October is World Menopause Awareness Month and that October 18 was World Menopause Awareness Day? Neither did I. Sisters, we've been in the dark.
On October 7, I was blessed to come into the light with an invitation to attend the inaugural Life in the Pause Festival hosted by two women of Caribbean heritage - Dixie Lincoln-Nichols @dixielincolnnichols (Trinidad) and Monique Cupid @brownskingreenbeauty (St. Vincent). They created this festival to empower women over 50 navigating the menopausal transition by fostering awareness, community, and celebration. The festival aims to reshape the menopause narrative and provide valuable resources for this transformative life phase.
With my own struggles of being propelled into perimenopause far too early after fibroid surgery, I was excited to see what the festival had to offer.
Hosted at the Caelum Gallery in Chelsea, New York, the event was a combination of empowering workshops with expert-led panels that addressed topics including symptom management, mental health, nutrition, self-care, and more; a marketplace with curated vendors provided products and services tailored to menopausal needs, from holistic remedies to fashion essentials; and live entertainment and music.
This festival hit the mark for me, not just because the information I received was so deeply personal, but because I believe everyone who attended walked away with something - whether it was vital information, a connection with another woman, or just an awareness of what to expect during menopause.
If you're like me and come from a Caribbean household where during your childhood and teenage years everything was taboo and would not be discussed, then Lincoln-Nichol's goal of "breaking down the barriers of the past and embracing the true essence of the menopausal journey" resonates deeply. She believes "gone are the days of silent suffering".
I concur!
Cupid is intent on rewriting the narrative and "challenging long-held beliefs about menopause by creating an environment where people experiencing perimenopause and menopause can come forward, share their stories, and embrace this sacred rite of passage for women".
My own experience at the festival left me feeling connected and more empowered to do a deep dive into my symptoms to find answers and possible solutions to my own suffering over the last three years.
Menopause is a natural stage in a woman's life that marks the end of her reproductive years. While some women embrace this transition with excitement, others may find it challenging. It's important to acknowledge that menopause can bring about various symptoms that can impact a woman's well-being.
One of the most common symptoms experienced during menopause is hot flashes, which are sudden feelings of intense heat that can lead to sweating and discomfort. Insomnia, or difficulty sleeping, is another common issue that women may face, making them feel tired and drained. Additionally, sexual dysfunction can be a distressing symptom for many women, affecting their intimate relationships.
It's worth noting that these symptoms can persist for an extended period, sometimes lasting 15 years or even longer. This prolonged duration can further contribute to feelings of discomfort, demoralization, and in some cases, a sense of serious illness.
One of the blaring facts I learned at the festival, and which I've personally struggled with for the last few years, is belly fat which is prevalent in so many middle-aged women, caused by the onset of perimenopause when our bodies begin to change and react differently to the foods we eat.
Another is brain fog. Sometimes I can't think straight and it stresses me out.
The best advice given - Start thinking about how to take control of your health.
Once you realize that you may be entering the perimenopause stage, it is the best time to make massive lifestyle changes to ensure that you thrive during your golden years. Preventative care should be the #1 priority.
This one message that was very loud during the festival -
What you do now sets your body up for later...at whatever stage you're at.
Coincidentally, this year's focus for World Menopause Month is cardiovascular health. This is heart health and it means we need to get moving! There are two ways to achieve this:
Check your steps every day. Got a health app on your phone? Great! Start tracking your movement during the day to get an accurate picture of how much you're moving or rather, see just how motionless you are. Apparently, the average person takes about 3,000 steps per week, a number which accounts for movement to work and back, to run errands, and maybe a brisk walk to exercise. But it is not enough. We must do better.
Strength Training. Why? Research has found that lifting weights is beneficial for women in perimenopause. It helps increase bone density, maintains muscle mass, boosts metabolism, and improves mood. Women, on average, have less muscle strength than men, and while his anthropometric-physiological trait may make us more vulnerable to excessive physical strain, injury, and an inability to work, strength training can be used for preventive health maintenance and to lessen musculoskeletal symptoms like osteoporosis.
So, if you're like me and never really gave weightlifting a fair chance before, now would be a great time to get proactive.
Here are a few more things I learned at the festival.
What we should be eating/drinking/taking during perimenopause:
Protein
Water…a lot
Vitamin D and Calcium for symptoms
What we should avoid:
Spicy foods (especially if experiencing hot flashes)
Caffeine
Alcohol
Sugar (because it impacts our belly fat and contributes to weight gain)
I’ve spent sleepless nights wondering: Why did Mom, Grandma, and every auntie act like perimenopause was some forbidden secret? No warnings about the night sweats. No pep talks for the mood swings. Just a collective shrug—as if suffering was our feminine birthright.
Here’s the painful truth: We’ve been conditioned to accept pain as "normal." But hot flashes aren’t rites of passage—they’re red flags. And the real tragedy? Even when we do seek help, doctors dismiss our symptoms like menopause is just "getting older."
The system is failing us. Did you know:
50% of women report struggling to get proper menopause care (Harvard, 2023)
Black women’s symptoms are 3x more likely to be undertreated (JAMA, 2022)
"Just lose weight" isn’t a treatment plan for brain fog or joint pain
We deserve better and Life in the Pause offered some ways for us to fight back:
Track symptoms religiously (I am a fan of journaling or iff this doesn’t quite work for you, there is always an app for that)
Demand hormone testing (don’t let them blame "stress")
Find a menopause-certified provider (NAMS listings are gold)
An article written in 2018 for AARP The Magazine titled "What Doctors Don’t Know About Menopause", says three out of four women who seek help for symptoms don’t receive it. I'm sure five years later not much has changed.
Let's agree to disagree that we need to ask more questions and demand proper care and follow through. Attending Life in the Pause gave me new resources to pursue in the course of finding relief for my symptoms. I also made some new friends who can relate.
I give a thumbs up to these beautiful souls - Dixie and Monique - for creating a platform for us to be supported, engaged, and educated. @lifeinthepause is a must!
Go follow and I hope to see you at the next event.
Did your family talk about menopause? How are you rewriting the script? Drop your stories below—let’s normalize this conversation. 👇🏾
